Not too much happening here. It's another "holding pattern". Waiting, just waiting.
Husband seems to hallucinate a lot lately. It comes and goes. Take for instance, the other day.
I had to run an errand and decided to take husband and the dog with me. Husband doesn't get out much, it's just too hard on him and me. But, this day, I did.
I left husband and the dog in the car, was gone for about 10 minutes. When I got back to the car and opened the door, husband was waving his hands and said, "Be careful, don't let the dog out. I just saw a pack of dogs run by and I don't want them getting our dog."
There were no pack of dogs. We were in the middle of the city.
He doesn't like to go in the bathroom when he first wakes up. Says he doesn't like to pee in front of other people. Argued with me yesterday, after telling him where to go to the bathroom. He told me, when I pointed out where the toilet was and how to lift up the seat, that that was disgusting and how dare I even suggest him using that thing to pee in.
Was twisting the door knob on the hall closet the other night. I asked him what he was doing. Said he was trying to turn on the bathroom light.
I'll be in the living room with the dog on my lap. He will stroke the bed and talk to the dog in the bedroom. Almost every night he thinks the dog is with him, when, in fact, he is on my lap in a different room.
I could go on and on.
I've noticed the tremors are more present now. Legs and arms. When I see it, I turn my head. I don't like looking at him when he has these tremors. It's not pretty.
Time to wake husband up. It's bath and shave day. When I do this, I never know what to expect. We can go anywhere.
My life. I'm still here, still trying to find something to laugh about each day. Most days, I can. Other days? Uh, not so much.
You are doing a great job at one of the hardest tasks possible. You are demonstrating your love for your husband in ways I cannot fathom. Thank you for sharing your journey, no matter how difficult. Prayers continue.
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