Mother's Day Weekend

So, tomorrow is Mother's Day. I always get sad on this day. Don't know why, my Mother is still living, I have children (boy do I have children), I don't understand it, I have always been this way. It should be a great day but tomorrow will be just another day for me. But to all of the Mother's out there, Happy Mother's Day.

Now, on to The Dementia Report: Leon has been very calm this week but, also, I've noticed the blank look in his eyes has been constant. He has been very confused most of the time, needing constant reminding of events, people and places. Yesterday, everytime I went down the hallway, the light was on. It finally dawned on me that it was Leon who was turning the light on. When I asked him why he was doing this he said, "I didn't do it". We were the only ones here. Why he was doing that, I don't know. It was during the day, so no light was needed.

Yesterday while we were out, he had to use the bathroom. When he came out, he was pale and confused looking. He told me he had bled all over the bathroom floor. He asked me if I would please call the Dr on Monday. Looks like they are going to have to operate to control this bleeding. He just seemed so scared. I felt so lost when he asked me to call the Dr. Felt so, "wow, I sure wished I had someone to lean on" sort of feeling. It scares me to think I have to make Life or Death decisions for another life. What a responsibility. I hope the decisions I make are the right ones.

He seems quiet this morning. I have offered to take him to the Emergency Room, but he will not go. I am concerned about the blood loss. Will have to watch him today and, if he takes a turn for the worse, well, ya'll know where I'll be.

Until then, this beast is doing it's job. And what a fine job it is.

So, for this Mother's Day weekend, I will be taking care of my husband; a man who cannot think for himself anymore, a man who would love to take his wife out for a special dinner, but doesn't know how anymore, a man who cannot be the man he was before the Beast came to stay and, a man who within the year, will no longer be.