Oy

Yesterday, in a nutshell was not good.  Hence, my reason for not posting.

One bright spot in my day was figuring out how to post a picture of my new oasis.  Hopefully, pictures will be uploaded this afternoon.

Husband woke up in his usual stupor.  But, he was angry.  Don't ask me why.  I tried really, really hard to avoid him.  Not easy being that we live in the same house and all.

He proceeded to tell me to call the DMV and order them to reinstate his driver's license.  I asked him why?  He said, "Well, being that you instigated all of this (What?), I want you to tell them I am just fine, that it was all your fault they revoked my license and make them reinstate it."  

I knew it was going to be downhill from there, but, I calmly told him that it would have to come from Dr A, not me.  Of course, he cannot drive anymore, but, I was hoping against hope that that would be the end of it.

Yeah, right.

He then launched into a spew of how I don't care for him, I never take him anywhere, he needs to get out of the house more often, I treat him badly, his diagnosis is my fault,  after all, he said, "if it wasn't for you taking me to the doctors, then none of this would've happened,"  and on and on and on and on and on.

I stood up, ready to leave, ( didn't know where I was going, Jack had the car and it's waaaaaay too hot to walk anywhere) and said, for the first time, but, I had had it, "Listen, honey, you have Alzheimer's Disease, and, it's not my fault."

Oh, you could hear a pin drop.  Yeah, it was that quiet.  There, I said it, and, you know what?  It felt good to say it.  He said he knew he has Alzheimer's, but, I needed to mind my own business when it came to taking him to the doctors, before diagnosis.  At that point, I walked away and left him in the bedroom, alone.  I was shaking so bad, I could not hold my cup of coffee.

He slept until about 3 PM, came out and said good morning to me.  I told him it was the afternoon, and was he feeling better?  He looked at me as if I had lost my mind, (well, I have, so what?) and asked me what was I talking about.  I told him what he had said earlier and he had no recollection of saying what he said!!

Oy vey.

This morning, in my email, there was an invite from Southwest Airlines to "book my flight now as time was running out."  Sure, fine, OK.  Don't temp me, Southwest.  Actually, after I read it, I laughed out loud.  It just struck me as so funny they would send me that after the day I had yesterday.

God is still showing me how to laugh.  And, I like that.  Thanks again, God.