"Fish Guy"

We did it. AND, we have phone & internet. Not on Saturday as cable company said, but they sent a tech out late yesterday afternoon. He had to do something on the roof. I am happy to report I am back on line and moved into our new home.

The actual move went so smoothly. Our church youth group showed up around 8:30 Sat morning. There were about 20 kids and two adults. They had the house emptied in 2 hours flat. Pat & Tyler moved the big fish tank. That was a job in itself. It's a big tank with BIG fish.

Kristen & I went to the old house yesterday to clean. Took me about 1 1/2 hours and done. As I was leaving the old house, Kristen was waiting for me in the car, I said to the house, "Good bye, I am not sorry to leave you". With that, I closed the door.

Tyler came to me Saturday very upset. He said when he arrived at the old house, husband did not know him. Kept calling him the "fish guy". Tyler at first thought he was joking. Finally, he realized husband did not know him. He went to husband and said, "Do you know who I am?" Husband said, "No, but I think you are the fish guy, right?" My son sat down and kept saying, "He didn't even know who I am", several times over. My heart broke for him. Tyler said, "Mom, he's really going to die, isn't he?" I just nodded my head. What could I say?

Husband has been OK so far. Of course, memory is a constant issue now. Walking is more slower, more of a shuffle and dragging of the feet.

He told me last night he likes the new house. Said it's more comfortable than the old one. I agree. Or, maybe he too is associating the old house with bad memories like me?

I love my new house. I will make new memories here, ones that will not include husband. It will be just me. Can I do it? I think I can. Actually, I have no choice now do I?