An "Ahhh" Day

Ahhh, I had a lovely day to myself yesterday.  I was about to leave for my errands when father in law called and wanted to spend the day with husband.  I offered to drop him off there.

Had a nice visit with father in law, gave him updates on husband, told him it has not been so good with husband.  He nodded his head, as we both looked at husband who was circling the patio in their back yard.  He looked at me and I realized what a connection we have now.  He said he would take care of husband, so, off  went.

Tyler picked up Jack, to spend the day with him, Kristen took off with her friend, which left me alone, with the dogs.

I got to have an "Ahhh" day.  So rare.  Guess God knew I needed it.  Several hours of silence.  No talking, no repeating, no nothing.  I felt my body begin to relax a little.  All too soon, everyone came home.

Husband was quite confused last night.  Said he didn't feel good.  He did not eat dinner.  Father in law said he was a little quiet, seemed like he "wasn't there" most of the time.  I told him he isn't "there" most of the time now.  I thanked him for caring for him and visiting with him.  He smiled but, looked so sad.  He went into Jack's room and spent some time with him.  Later, Jack told me, "Every time Grandpa comes here, he always slips me money."  He said that father in law tells him, "Here Jackie,  here's some money for you."  Jack and I had a chuckle over that.

I suppose we are entering Stage 6 of this disease.  There are 7 Stages, which I thought he was at 5 for quite some time.  I don't believe he's there anymore.  There are too many signs telling me otherwise.  No, I don't go by numbers, but, with Alzheimer's, there are stages.   It's like a chart.  I'm glad I have these numbers, it helps me to know where we are at.

We see Dr A in July.  I know he will see this rapid decline in husband as well.  I don't know what he will recommend, if anything, but, I am anxious to have him verify where we are at now.

I have heard nothing on his EEG.  Don't know if that's good or not.  Seizure activity at night seems to have subsided.  Tremors during the day remain.  It's pitiful seeing his body wracked with tremors.

Wives, cherish your life partners.  I used to complain like everyone else about my husband.  I always wanted him to change and be different from other husbands.

Well, I got my wish.  Or, did I?  He changed, all right.  He is different now for sure.  He can't walk, can't talk right and can't think for himself anymore.

Accept your husband for what he is in the here and now.  You just never know when the rug will be pulled out from underneath you.

Love them as they are.