Mother's Day 2012

First of all, Happy Mother's Day to all of those Mommy's.  I don't know how my day will be spent because my life is always a question nowadays.  One never knows in this house.  It could be wonderful or, like yesterday, it could be not so great.

I had taken husband to Lowe's so he could look at gloves.  If he is to use the manual wheelchair, he will need gloves to protect his hands.  Friday, at the zoo, he developed blisters on his hands.  I told him we would get him a cheap pair, as we don't use that wheelchair often.  Only when we go places that require a lot of walking.

I was looking at something when I discovered husband gone.  I walked that store twice.  One of the workers asked me if he could help me find something.  I told him Yes, my husband.  He chuckled and said that happens often.  I said no, sir, my husband has Alzheimer's, wanders off and gets lost.  He got serious and said, "Well, let's go find him."  I described him and within a few minutes, this man was at the end of the store, waving his hands above his head.  He had found him.  I couldn't thank him enough.

There was husband, sitting on the floor of the store, looking at gloves.  He was in his own world.  I looked at the gloves, noticed they were awfully expensive and told him so.  I said we were going for cheap gloves as he doesn't need  all that fancy schmancy stuff.  Husband became angry, started throwing a fit in the store.  I couldn't get him out fast enough.

He was furious the rest of the day with me.  Too bad.  

So, you see, my Mother's Day will probably not be a day filled with warm, sweet memories.  It will be just another day as far as I'm concerned.  I will call my mother and honor her on this day.  My kids will try to make my day special, I know that, but, we always have this shadow following us.  There is always a dark cloud in this house.

And I'm OK with it.  It is what it is.  I know my children love me.  I know I love my mother.  I had a husband who used to love me, but, he has slipped into his own world now.  So, I will cherish  Mother's Day past, look forward to the calls from the kids, and be thankful for the memories.