Just breathe

Well, I wanted to come on here yesterday morning and post about how wonderful my Mother's Day was.  However, Alzheimer's always wants to throw a wrench at me.

Husband began to hallucinate around 4 AM yesterday morning and it took me 4 hours to bring him out of it.  By that time, I was spent.

Husband was hallucinating to the mirror in the bathroom.  Said a murder took place in the mirror.  My first thought was, "Oh no, not the mirror again."  It took me awhile to calm him down and get him out of the bathroom.  Once that was done, I got him back to bed and to sleep.

Next thing I knew, I woke up to find him gone.  I yelled his name out and he answered from the living room.  There he was, sitting in the recliner.  I went to him and asked him what he was doing.  He looked up at me and said, "I don't know where I am at." 

If you have ever witnessed a person hallucinating you'll understand.  The look in his eyes is not pleasant to look at.  They turn very dark and he takes on a whole different look.  His bottom lip turns down, and his jaw changes the shape of his face.  He doesn't look like him.

It is, in a word, awful.

This morning, as I was making my espresso, he shuffled into the kitchen.  Surprised, I said, "Well, good morning."  He had that hallucinating look.  My heart fell.  He looked straight at me and said, "Where is your bathroom?"  He had just walked past (when I say walk, I mean he held onto the walls and drug his legs)  the bathroom.

I am hoping today will be better, but, who am I fooling?  It'll never get better.

On the bright side, my Mother's Day was just great.  Jack called me from Germany!  My  children.  The total joys of my life.

And, good news!!

I got approved for the apartment up in Colorado Springs!  Colorado, here I come.

The ups and downs of life.  Just when I thought yesterday couldn't get any worse, I get  the call that the apartment is mine in the Springs.

3 months to go and counting.

Breathe, Sue, breathe.