Denial

We are now entering a "cooling off" phase of this disease. Leon has stabilized somewhat. There has been no sudden decline, he seems to have stayed the same for the past several days. Oh, don't get me wrong, he's not normal, but there has been no changes, yet.

Yesterday, well, not good. He is insisting on driving and we had a discussion on that. Always a mistake on my part. Dr said no more driving. He says I always make it worse than what it really is when we go to the Dr. I don't know what to do. His Drivers' License expires on the 23rd of this month. Wants to renew it. Uh, no, but, hard when your husband is told that that too, is being taken away.

He is in denial about everything. Says he's fine. Anyone know how hard this is? My husband does what his father does. If you deny anything is wrong, well, it doesn't exist. Makes my head spin. His father is the same. He told my husband, "Well, I don't know what Sue is saying, you drive fine". Denial, just like he was when my mother in law got this lovely disease. Told the family, she's fine, then she dies. I remember the day she died, how the family came together and was shocked at her "sudden death". What?

When I needed my father in law to go with us to the Neurologist last year to give a family history, I called him. He said he didn't think there was anything wrong with Leon. I told him he needed to face the facts, that he has the same thing wrong with him that his mother had. He agreed to come, and as we were walking through the hospital, I looked at him watching his son walk. And I said, "Think that's normal, huh?" The look in his eyes was pitiful as he watched his son walk. But, admit it? No. They both are in denial and It. Drives. Me. Crazy.

I know his father thinks I'm the one who's crazy. You can tell by the way he looks at me. I want to shake him.

I am just at a loss today. I want to keep my husband as far away as I can from his father, but that will hurt Leon. He loves his father. I can't take that away from him, too much has been taken already. But what do I do?

It's one thing to have to watch your husband loose his ability to walk, talk and think. It's another thing to have the father of your husband convince him otherwise. He motions with his hands and says, "Oh, he's fine, he's fine".

Mi vida loca.