Yay!

As I've mentioned before, Fall has always been my favorite time of year. Not so much anymore, but, I have to say, I am enjoying the cool mornings. It will get warm during the day, but when the sun sets, the cool comes back. Refreshing. Or could it be that I have accepted the fact that along with the flowers and trees, my husband will die?

When I look back to last year this time, I have changed. I am now more accepting of this disease, have learned to go with the flow. I can now recite statistics in my head, watch for signs of progression, swallow hard when those progressions happen, answer his many questions over and over without a flinch, all the while holding down the fort.

Not that I am super woman. I have my days, I have my moments. This year though, there has been a change in me. I feel an inner strength I always knew I had, but, needed to find it. I found it in God. He keeps me going.

Nothing got "fixed" yesterday. Yay.

Found out I don't have to purchase books for my Doula certification. Can check them out at the library. Another Yay. Thinkng alot about it this morning. Thinking this is a step in the right direction for me and my future. Who knows where this will take me? All I know is that I feel very strongly that this is what I was meant to do.

Husband is still sleeping, Jack has left for school. It's quiet here. Oh, how I love these quiet mornings. All too soon, he will be awake and the quiet of my morning will be screeching to a stop. I cherish while I can. My time.