I can honestly say, yesterday was such a good day. Almost like old times. Oh, such fun we had. Each kid brought food. Patrick did all the BBQ'ing. I made potato salad and stuffed eggs. We had BBQ'd chicken, cheeseburgers and hot dogs. Food was good, company even better.
Brittney, Jack's girlfriend, came as well. A soon as she got here, she told me Jack wanted her to set up a Skype account for me, so I could see him on the computer. When she was done, she got him on Skype and what a great thing for me. He got to talk to everyone and then it was Mom's turn. We had a good conversation. He showed me his room, showed me his view outside his room. Germany is really pretty. Now, all I have to do is Skype him and it's like having him here. I couldn't thank Brittney enough. She's a sweet girl.
Husband was good yesterday. I don't think he hallucinated once. He was confused most of the time, smiling, but, oblivious to everything and everyone around him. I would look at his face and know that he was just lost in his world, but, no hallucinations were present. At least, for one day, I got a break. Him as well.
One of the kids came to me and said, "He doesn't look like him anymore." I know, I said, I know.
Before I went to bed, I asked God to let him sleep all night. I sure could use a good night's sleep. God answered my prayer, as he slept all night, with only one exception. He did wake up and was trying to get out of bed. I talked him out of it and he did lay back down and went back to sleep. Oh, glorious sleep!
I had a dream last night. In this dream, husband was well. We were waking and talking, holding hands. He was exactly like he used to be, before he got sick. I would look up at him and we would kiss, saying we loved one another. I remember in this dream it was very sunny and bright outside. I remember feeling so good inside.
When I woke up, it was dark outside and I turned over in bed and there was my reality.
Husband, sleeping fitfully, jerking and moaning.
Today, as the rough moments come, I will think of my dream. I will remember what it was like. Before Alzheimer's. Before all of this.
Yes, it was good. Before.