My back hurts. My neck hurts. My shoulders hurt. The house is packed. Complete. Boxes stacked in the dining room. The only thing left now is cleaning out the fridge and freezer. Have to give food away to the neighbor. Taking all the cable equipment to cable on Friday. That means no TV Friday night. Don't care, will be too tired to even watch TV.
This has been hard. But, will be worth it in the end, I keep telling myself.
Husband has been in a good mood. He sits on his bed or wheelchair and watches me. He will ask questions all day, but, for the most part, he is excited to go. I would be too if I didn't have to do this alone.
I ran an errand in the afternoon yesterday. When I got back, husband was standing in the hallway, holding onto the walls. He didn't say "hi", instead, he looked at me and asked, "How old am I?" I told him "48", "really? I'm 48?". "Yes, you're 48". "I didn't know I was 48, that's old, isn't it?" "No, it's not old," I said. And that was the end of that conversation.
It's like that around here nowadays. He asks the craziest questions and is OK with my answers. Usually.
Last night, he found me in the kitchen. He asked me to come to the bedroom, we have a problem. Now, being that the bedroom is totally packed, with only 2 beds and a TV in there, I was curious.
The "problem" was, at it turned out was, according to him, his hospital bed was bolted to the floor. How in the world were we going to get it un bolted? Oh dear, I thought, here we go. He would not believe me that the bed was not bolted. I took him in the room and moved the hospital bed sideways, showing him that there were no bolts. "Oh, I saw the bolts earlier today, did you take them off?" To avoid any more confusion, I just said, "Yeah, I did" "Good", was his reply.
Hey, it beats the alternative.
I will try to post tomorrow and Friday morning. I will be cut off from communication until probably Sunday, when we get to Tish's house. Cable will be turned on at the new apartment next Wednesday.
Boy, what an adventure this has been. This is going to be a whole new start, a whole new life. Part of me is excited, while the other part is a little nervous.
I'm taking my husband to die in Colorado. His decision, his wish.
And, I will honor it.