Husband's last camping trip

Husband's last camping trip

Friday, August 19, 2011

I'm OK, you're OK

Got a call Wednesday morning from Dr A. He wanted to see us that afternoon. I told him we had an appointment on the 31st, but he said he had an opening, so off we went to see this specialist at UNM, but not in the hospital, he is off hospital grounds, in the Mind Science Center. It was easy for us, as we don't have to park underground and walk so far. Husband can only walk a little, then tires out.

Dr A gave him some more tests, cognitive tests. He did ok, but was so nervous, you could see him shaking. Failed miserably, but all in all, Dr was pleased about some of the abilities he still has.

I told Dr about the jerking, vibrating and choking. He just nodded. Dr A was impressed with his upper body strength. Said he wants to push this genetic testing. He wants to be 100% on the Familial Frontal Lobe Dementia. He said he is leaning toward Early Onset Alzheimers, but this type of dementing illness or any type of dementing illness has so many charateristics, he wants to be 100% certain. If we can't get it approved, he said the only choice I would have would be to request an autopsy. Then, he said, we would know for sure. I do want to know if Jack carries the gene, I do need to know if he will be afflicted with it. "One thing, Mrs Lucero", he said, "Whatever name you want to call this, he is terminal, his life expectancy is short, you and I both know that. We will do everything we can to make him comfortable". I just sat there nodding my head, nothing to say, it's all going to end the way we don't want it to end. He is dying.

Of course, husband thought they had made a mistake and gave him prescriptions for the "stiffness" in his legs. On the way home he said, "Dr says there's nothing wrong with me but it's my legs, they are just a little stiff". What? After I brought my car back under control, I just agreed with him. If that makes him happy, then so be it. Let him think that. He seems happier. All he talked about yesterday. All. Day. Long.

Last night I found him wandering in the garage. I asked him what he was doing in the garage at 10:00, he mumbled something I could not understand, seemed to come out of his trance, shuffled back to bed and slept.

How strange this disease is. Wednesday at the Dr's, he seemed ok, next night, he's caught wandering around in the garage, totally confused.

Sunday I am making Jack a birthday dinner. Pat, Christine, Tyler & Susie will be coming over. I hope it will be nice for Jack. He acts so uncomfortable around his Dad lately. I think husband can sense it too.

Have I ever said how crappy this is? Yes? Well, I'll say it again. This is crappy.

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