Medicare, Birthdays & Acting

Husband got his Medicare card in the mail the other day. As of 12/01/11, he will be on full Medicare. Good news, I guess. It just seemed so....final. He seemed excited, said, "That's good news, right?" "It sure is", I said. He had to sign the card. He wrote his first name, but when it came to his middle initial, he said, "how do you make a G?" It was a scribble, that G, but I said it was fine. For some reason, after he is gone, I want to keep that card and look at that scribble that is supposed to be his middle initial and remember the day.

Had a few spells yesterday of mood changing. One minute he was fine, the next he seemed agitated. I have to be very careful at how I speak to him, as sometimes my voice can upset him. Have to measure the level of my voice and think before I speak. Otherwise, I upset him by what or how I say things.

Picked up his 2 other prescriptions Dr A prescribed yesterday. Of course, I had to take him with me. Ugh. When we got back in the car, he ripped open the bag, took out the drugs and said to me with a big smile on his face, "This is gonna fix my legs, I just know it". I just smiled and nodded my head. What else can I say? He tried to read the labels, got frustrated and put them in the back seat.

We went to his Dad's house, his dad wasn't home, so he visited with a neighbor who he's known since birth. This neighbor is old now, and as I watched the two of them, both using canes, both hunched over, it saddened me to think that the neighbor is at least 35 years older than husband, yet, they walk the same. This neighbor knows that husband has the same disease that killed his mother, but, he never lets on to husband he knows. Sad to watch.

Tomorrow, I will have Jack's birthday dinner. Husband just said to me, "Tomorrow is Jack's birthday". "No", I say, "it's Jack's birthday dinner, his birthday was last Tuesday". He just nodded his head, "the look" is there today. We can go anywhere today, I just feel it.

He is, however, looking forward to church tonight. I am too.

Don't know what today will bring, it's always a surprise. At least I can almost tell what kind day I'm going to have within twenty minutes of him waking. So far, he's confused this morning, in a "mood", and I have to play pretend everything is OK.

Missed my calling: shoulda been an actress.