Husband's last camping trip

Husband's last camping trip

Thursday, April 5, 2012

Familiar Feelings

We got husband's chair yesterday. It's not a scooter, but one of those wheel chairs that go places. I think they call it the Hover Round? Whatever the name, it is wonderful. Husband will use it in the house. I cannot lift it, way too heavy. I have to find a place that will install something on the back of my car so I can transport it. Trouble is, I don't have that kind of money to pay for it. Will have to let God work in that area. It would be so nice to have it with us when we do go places. No more walking for husband.

Husband has been in good spirits. I thought he would be upset by another change, but, he has seemed to accept it. I honestly think that once his dad came around, he too came around.

There was a lot of seizure activity in the night. Hard for me to sleep. There were a few days last week that he slept OK. No seizures to speak of. Now, all of a sudden, they have come back stronger than before. Oh, how I hate this. His body is being ravaged by these seizures.

I showed father in law the genetic test results. He read it, gave it back to me and said, "I can't read anymore. I don't want to see anymore. And I have to accept it. I'm just too sad right now."

Last night I had this feeling. It was a familiar feeling. I have had it for over 2 years now. Then, it suddenly dawned on me what it is.

It's the feeling of a broken heart.

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