Every time husband goes downhill a bit it takes me by surprise. I don't know why. Maybe it's because of the extreme way he does things now or, just the sheer audacity of this monster.
I have been wanting to lay bricks at the end of our patio. There is a small patch of dirt that was never finished. So, landlord said he'd take it off the rent if I would buy the bricks. Off to Home Depot I went. Of course, husband had to go. Oy.
Once I found the cheap bricks, I started loading them on the cart. I only needed 50 of them, so, it wasn't that hard. Husband insisted on helping. Once I was done, one of the workers came to assist me. We started talking about me taking 25 in my car and coming back for the other half. When he was loading the bricks, we decided that all 50 of them would be fine in the car (I have a Santa Fe, SUV) being that I only lived a few blocks away.
Once we got home, Jack & Kristen unloaded the bricks. I heard husband talking to Jack. Jack had a funny look on his face. I came up to them and Jack said, "Mom?" "What?", I said. "Dad says you have to go back and get 100 more?" "Whaat?" That's when husband says that I told him I had to go back to get another 100 of those bricks. Where he got that, I'll never know.
During the afternoon, he would occasionally ask me when I was going back for a 100 more bricks. Each and every time I would explain, again, that we did not need any more bricks. Exasperating! Exhausting!
He took a bad fall Thursday night. Outside. Against a planter we have out back. He insisted on turning that small patch of dirt at the end of our patio, prepping for the bricks. I told him not to do that, Jack will do it. He fell, hard.
I found him back at that patch of dirt yesterday afternoon. I asked him what he was doing. Said he wanted to get an idea of how to lay the bricks. I also bought a bag of sand, to help settle the bricks. I found the bag half full last night. I don't have any idea what husband did with half a bag. I looked at the small patch of dirt, no sand there. I have no clue where or what he did with it. Have to buy another bag of sand.
This time, however, I'm going to hide it from husband. Who knows where it'll end up if I don't.
Last night, after everyone had gone to bed, I had to have a good laugh with myself. My day was so stressful with husband yesterday. He had me rattled all day long. Thought again of the missing half bag of sand. I couldn't help it, I started to laugh.
Oh, this is something I would not wish on anyone. One day, I may be in a position to help another who is going through what I'm going through. I hope so. I have so much to offer.
We all have our crosses to bear. It's how we bear them that counts. We can fold up. We can give up. We have a choice. My choice is to laugh.
It beats the alternative.